Cleaning and cleaning

I forgot how rewarding cleaning can be.  I know that may sound crazy to some but it makes me feel satisfied when I can look back on the job I did and feel like I actually got something done.  Some days I feel like I don't get anything done but some cleaning takes place inside.  I have days where I'm sorting through things in the house and days were I'm sorting through things in my mind and my heart.  When I clean sometimes I'm doing both! 

I've been on a quest to "find myself" for some time.  I don't know why but a lot of times I feel like I should be doing something "more important"...whatever that means!  I'm a SAHM what is more important than that?  Not much!  The problem comes when my kids are at school and I'm at home wondering what I'm supposed to be doing that's so important.

I guess it's summed up here:  Yesterday my 10 year old over heard me on the phone saying, "I don't need to be here when the kids get home." (The 16 year old gets home first.)  He then said to me, smiling and looking up with his big brown eyes, "yes you do."  Thanks, Loften, for reminding me that you still need me.  Now I can "wipe away" those defeating thoughts...cleaning is good!

Appreciation

The grass is always greener on the other side.  I have to disagree with this statement.  I've come to realize that it is, in fact, the polar opposite.  I sometimes look at my life and think..."I wish I was/had/could _____...like so and so."  But after a closer look I think again.  No one's life is great all the time in all areas of their life.  Everyone is carrying their own burdens and enjoying their own victories.  If life were always great we wouldn't know it because we would have nothing to compare it to.
I feel blessed.  Some days I wonder when the shoe is going to drop and then ask myself why it has to drop at all.  I am just taking each day for what it is.  Feeling grateful for what I have in my life...my health and general well-being...a wonderful, loving, handsome husband who makes me feel like a princess...3 smart, beautiful, healthy boys who I adore and who are teaching me things about myself on a daily basis...supportive parents...a sister for a best friend...lots of fun and supportive girlfriends...the list is endless...I AM BLESSED!